Bittersweet

So, the estrangement from my extended family that I have alluded to a few times continues apace. I'm starting to feel better about it; certainly time is doing it's legendary healing of all wounds. I won't say I'm happy about it, or that I don't wonder whether we'll ever speak again or be close again, but it's not taking up huge chunks of my brain power any more, and for that I am grateful. I'm learning to fill those holes in my life with other things, and I think on balance it is a good change that I've had to make.

It doesn't change the fact, though, that sometimes things are a little poignant. This afternoon, Bruce, Caetlin and I went to lunch at a casual restaurant that we usually have visited with my sister and brother-in-law. On the way inside from the car, Caetlin says, clearly remembering the times we've been there with them, "Aunt [Sister] gone bye-bye."

Bruce just said, yes, baby, you really don't know how true that is. Aunt [Sister] is gone bye-bye in so many more ways than one.

And then a minute later she followed it up with, "And Uncle [Brother-In-Law] gone bye-bye too."

And Bruce said, yes, sweetie, he was truly unfortunate collateral damage and he's gone bye-bye too. Bruce had thought of Brother-In-Law as a friend, and has been terribly disappointed that in the turmoil between my sister and me, Brother-In-Law seems to have written Bruce off as well.

We moved on, swinging Caetlin between us ("One...Two...THREE!"), and into the restaurant for lunch, even as we moved on in our conversation and our thoughts. But the short exchange stayed with me, funny and sad, wisdom from the mouths of babes, etc. We are- I am- moving on. I'm still sad that I have to, but yes- my family is gone bye-bye.